Dating is tough stuff for any teen, and being  lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, queer or questioning can add to the challenge. Should you be “out” as a couple? How do you deal with other people’s reactions?
 

Things to Consider When Dating

After you start dating someone, you might be confronted with some difficult issues. One of the biggest concerns is how “out” you want to be as a couple. This means, how many people do you want to know that you are a romantic couple?

This can be tricky when the two people in the relationship have different opinions about how out they want to be. One person may want to be completely out, but the other may want the relationship to stay private. Most people prefer being out only to folks they know they can trust. They know that the stigma (wrong as it is) about being GLBTQ can make life difficult for a long time.

Often, the best strategy is to go slow and compromise. Going slow lets couples and individuals check out the scene and carry out damage control if necessary. Compromising on this issue and many others is the key to making any relationship work. However, keep in mind that some teens might feel unsafe even having certain friends or family know that they are GLBTQ or in an GLBTQ couple, and it’s important to be sensitive to those concerns.

Many GLBTQ couples also face the choice of attending public events as a couple. Being out together doesn’t have to come all at once. Remember, coming out is a process, and sometimes it is wise to choose people who you think will honor and support your relationship.

In fact, one of the most important considerations is preparing yourself for others’ reactions. There are still many people who are uncomfortable with people that identify as GLBTQ. Just because you are in a relationship doesn’t mean that people will judge you any less.  Being a GLBTQ couple can be just as rewarding as being in any other relationship. Overcoming obstacles is part of helping us grow as individuals and couples.